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Friday, January 17, 2014

As if your First


What an amazing poem ... or whatever you'd call these ramblings
(does poetry have to be a certain structure? naa)

By Steve Sauve

I almost died last year
spent over three months in the hospital
in which time they had to repair my heart twice
it was by far the most horrible
experience of my life
some of my fellow poets have been urging me
to write a poem capturing these events
a serious piece about mortality
but I dont want to write a poem that
brings everybody down
see, the reason most of my poems are comedic
is not that it's all i'm capapble of writing
it's that I want to use my time on stage to uplift people
If you walk out of here with a smile
then I feel like, in some tiny way,
I've improved the quality of your life
and that means more to me
than winning some competition ever could
so if I'm going to write a serious poem
it's sure as fuck not going to be about pain and suffering

Know what tomorrow is?
tomorrow is the one year anniversary of
the day I got out of the hospital
they may have carried me in on a stretcher
but I walked out on my own two goddamn feet
stronger and wiser from the experience

I've heard it said that you should live your life
as if each day might be your last
what the fuck kind of morbid bullshit is that?
Now, I've got a two foot scar down the middle of my chest
that says I probably know more about these matters than you
So take it from me:
The secret of life is to live every day
as if it were your first

When every day is your first
you free yourself from all the cynicism you've built up over the years
You allow yourself to see beauty in all its forms
And trust me, it's fucking everywhere
from the hurried commuter pausing to hold a door open for a stranger
to the room full of people who spent ten dollars
on a friday night to see a poetry show
that's beautiful

Every day
I awake to the sun hitting my face for the first time
I breathe my first breath and it's intoxicating
Every day
I walk out into a world where no one has ever judged me
I look up at the sky and remember how
fascinating the clouds are
And every day
Someone will be the most beautiful
woman I've ever seen

When every day is your first
love has never let you down
you've never been rejected or abused
and you realized that love has got to be
the most ridiculous fucking thing to be
afraid of that there is

I'm not afraid anymore
death tried to take me and I kicked its ass
I'll be damned if love is gonna finish me off

Once you allow yourself to love and be loved
to love who you are 'cause (heh we've already covered this)
you're all beautiful
It's like flipping a switch:
everything changes instantly
it changes from a matter of "if" to a matter of time

See love is a commodity that's in constant demand
and there's an infinite supply
all you've gotta do is learn how to manage it

I'm sure to some of you this sounds like preachy nonsense
that you'll immediately dismiss:
"oh shit, Steve's gone all new agey on us"
but if you take nothing else away from this poem
Then at least take this:
Don't run from love
and smile
you're so beautiful when you smile

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