How do you become something you're not?
How do you let go of the old you so that you may evolve into who you want to be?
There must be a way. But there is resistance in me.
How is there resistance to betterment? To increasing happiness?
Are we just doomed to stay little, miserable, alone, struggling through life?
I don't believe so. I know there's a way out of this dark tunnel.
Hard to see it right now, but as my partner put it, if you're spinning the stick, it will make fire. You must keep going and be patient; it will ignite. If you stop though, you'll never get the fire you worked so hard to make.
I must revisit my beliefs about who I am. I can change who I am in a day, if I so choose, can I not? It just takes a lot of power and letting go of ego (as it's being fed by your propelling of stories about yourself through the past). Traumatizing events make it hard for your mind to relate to anything differently. Actually, even events that don't feel traumatizing impact who you are today, and instill fear of change in you. Everything that's ever happened to me, or that I created for myself, led me to who I am today ... but what if I suddenly chose a different path? Could I change faster than I think? Instead of it taking me 20 odd years to come to this, could I take 20 days and transform who I am completely? Hardest part will be shedding the belief systems I don't even know I hold. So, then, first step would be to dig deep and find out what's holding me back.
What beliefs don't suit who I want to be anymore? What can I do everyday to instill the right ones?