I see more and more how every single little action I take affects the whole world around me. It affects both the animate and inanimate. If I decide to let go of an unhealthy relationship, everyone around me must shift too. I must trust that I make the right decisions, and as a dear friend said to me, as long as I'm being honest with myself, no one else needs to justify my actions. And if they love me and care for me, they will not expect anything more. They will support me in my life-altering decisions.
Relationships are messy but they surely teach one about themselves in the biggest ways. I lost myself to take care and feel for someone else. It wasn't right, but it naturally occured. I couldn't help it. I noticed it, I zoomed out and saw just how much loving this person stopped me from loving myself, and so I had to let them go to come back to me. Every single relationship/friendship/acquaintence in life is like this also: they'll whirlwind into our lives, sweep us off our feet, make us lose balance or anchor us and ground us, and then they will leave. Whether we decide to leave them, or they leave willingly -- on a trip, to follow their dreams, to pass on to the next world -- we are experiencing death around us at all times. We must learn to let go and accept constant change in our lives. This is also why we must love ourselves and love being alone: when everyone has left, when you've left everyone, when you shut your eyes at night or for the last time in your life, are you comfortable with yourself? Are you in love with yourself?