Granularity

You can't make an hourglass with a boulder.

But break the boulder into sufficiently small bits of sand, and you can tell time.

You wouldn't want to eat a baked loaf of ice cream, mustard, fish, bread, capers and cheese.

But separate them into their component parts and you can open a restaurant.

It's tempting indeed to build the one, the one perfect thing, here it is, it's for everyone.

But one size rarely fits all.

The alternative is break it into components, to find the grid and to fill it in. Not too small, not too big. Grains that match what we're ready to engage with.

- Seth Godin

After a While

After a While
Veronia A. Shoffstall


After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul and you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't always mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes aheadwith the grace of woman, not the grief of a child and you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much so you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure you really are strong you really do have worth and you learn and you learn with every goodbye, you learn...

Discovering Magic

Any perception can connect us to reality properly and fully.
What we see doesn't have to be pretty, particularly;
We can appreciate anything that exists.
There is some principle of magic in everything, some living quality.
Something living, something real, is taking place in everything.

- Unknown

Pearl of my Heart

pearl of my heart 

--

in my dreams

i am of the sea

and you are my most treasured pearl

i hold you,

wrapped, neatly nestled

in the crook of my arm

i am afraid,

that you might slip away, swiftly;

that my grasp is too strong.

in my dreams

i am of the sea

and you are my most treasured pearl

i hold you,

but i know that i cannot

forever hold your beauty with integrity

yet still, i am afraid,

that you may never come home;

that my grasp is not strong enough.

but oh, in my dreams,

dear pearl, you, 

in your shining shell,

you deserve to be free,

to flow in the vastness that be,

to experience eternal possibility

you deserve to be free,

and if you stayed nestled in me,

true love i could never give to thee.

in my dreams

we are of the sea

and we are a most treasured pair

we hold not onto the other

unravelled, perfectly playful

in the magic of water’s flowing form

i am no longer afraid,

that you may never come home;

for my flesh and your shining shell are one

in my dreams

we hold not onto the other

i am no longer afraid.

Slow and Steady

Slow and Steady
by Lydia Beauregard
--

On this slow and steady Sunday
I awaken and see the sky is grey;
I roll over and place my arms around you.

You slowly, steadily come to life,
Feel my arm around you,
and turn over to look at me; I see you.

Soon we are wrapped up in each other,
touching, twirling, syncing, dancing,
Feeling our slow and steady body rhythms.

I get up real slow, make coffee as usual,
You make a fire, steady in your routine,
And we come together to enjoy a simple feast.

We separate, but stay close,
While we slowly and steadily start productivity,
Although others might not consider us productive.

I see a beautiful eulogy for a friend; I cry,
Reminding me of how quickly, how suddenly,
The subtlety of our lives can be taken away.

I am grateful for you and I, for these moments,
Knowing that the quick and the sudden
Make our slow and steady so important.

Shame and guilt

There is a difference between shame and guilt.

Shame: the fear of disconnection. Am I worthy of connection?

You're never good enough.
Who do you think you are?
- Shame

Shame is a focus on self, guilt is a focus on behavior.
Shame is "I am bad". Guilt is "I did something bad"
I'm sorry I made a mistake. - Guilt
I'm sorry. I am a mistake. - Shame

The ability to hold something we've done or failed to do up against who we want to be is incredibly adaptive. It's uncomfortable but it's adaptive.

Brenee Brown on Shame, Guilt, Vulnerability

Choice

So this is what life is like

a life that you take hold of

that you make choices in

that you decide

yes

or

no

So this is what life is like

when you shut one door

to fully open another

to finally decide

yes

or

no

You'll never be done
saying
yes
or
no